Comforting someone who is upset
Comforting someone who is upset usually comes after simple helping. In one study, about 1 in 8 toddlers quickly comforted a sad adult at 18 months, against about 2 in 3 at 30 months.
We haven't yet found studies that measured the age when most children start. The sections below say what is known.
How sure are we?
Not sure yet. Only small studies have looked at this so far. How we know this
What it’s a sign of
Your child is starting to notice and care about how others feel.
An earlier study found helping, sharing and comforting all appearing between ages 1 and 2, most often towards their mother.
We don't yet know the age by which most children comfort others.
A main source for the ages
Toddlers’ Prosocial Behavior: From Instrumental to Empathic to Altruistic Helping
Margarita Svetlova, Sara R. Nichols, Celia A. Brownell · 2010 · Child Development
- Children
- About 65 toddlers
- Where
- The United States
- Ages
- 18 and 30 months
- How
- Researchers tested toddlers in a lab
- What it found
- Nearly every toddler helped at some point. Comforting was much rarer at 18 months: about 1 in 8 quickly brought a sad adult something comforting, against about 2 in 3 at 30 months.
- Limits
- Small groups at two ages.
A classic study on this
Development of concern for others.
Carolyn Zahn‐Waxler, Marian Radke‐Yarrow, Elizabeth L. Wagner, Michael Chapman · 1992 · Developmental Psychology
- Children
- Not given in the summary we read
- Where
- Not given in the summary we read
- Ages
- 1 to 2 years
- How
- Mothers and researchers recorded toddlers' reactions
- What it found
- Helping, sharing and comforting someone upset all appeared between ages 1 and 2, most often towards their mother.
- Limits
- We have only read the summary, which gives no numbers.
If you’re worried about your child, talk to your child and family health nurse or GP.
Last checked 2 November 2026