Waiting for something they want
Being able to wait for something grows a lot between ages 2 and 5. In a large US study, about half of 4½-year-olds waited the full 7 minutes to get a bigger treat.
We haven't yet found studies that measured the age when most children start. The sections below say what is known.
How sure are we?
Not sure yet. Only one study with numbers has been read so far, and it tested one age. How we know this
What it’s a sign of
Your child is learning to hold back from doing what they want right now, which helps with turn-taking and plans.
How long children can wait depends on how long the wait is and on their background: in the US study, 68 in 100 children of mothers with a degree waited the full time, against 45 in 100 of other children. A famous early study linked waiting to later success, but a larger repeat found the link was about half as strong.
We don't yet know the ages when children first manage short waits, or how much they vary.
A study that questioned earlier findings
Revisiting the Marshmallow Test: A Conceptual Replication Investigating Links Between Early Delay of Gratification and Later Outcomes
Tyler W. Watts, Greg J. Duncan, Haonan Quan · 2018 · Psychological Science
- Children
- About 900 children
- Where
- Ten places across the United States
- Ages
- 4½ years
- How
- Researchers timed how long children waited for a bigger treat
- What it found
- At 4½, about half of the children waited the full 7 minutes. How long children waited was linked with later school results, but much less than earlier studies had suggested.
- Limits
- Tested only one age, so it can't show when children start being able to wait.
A main source for the ages
Effortful control in early childhood: Continuity and change, antecedents, and implications for social development.
Grazyna Kochanska, Kathleen T. Murray, Elena T. Harlan · 2000 · Developmental Psychology
- Children
- About 100 toddlers
- Where
- Iowa, United States
- Ages
- About 2 to 3 years
- How
- Researchers tested the same toddlers twice
- What it found
- Toddlers got much better at waiting and holding back between about 2 years and nearly 3.
- Limits
- We have only read the summary, which doesn't give the shares of children at each age.
If you’re worried about your child, talk to your child and family health nurse or GP.
Last checked 2 November 2026